|
|
((The screen engulfs in fire burning quickly and leaving behind the burn remains of the blue HWC logo followed by the word "Brutality being spray painted over it. The image fades as the voice of Popa Roach is heard saying, "Cut my life into peices. This is my last resort!" Popa Roach is seen playing in the WarZone ring surrounded by large monitors showing different clips of each HWC Wrestler. The camera pans around as one shows Tiger diving off the ladder after B.D. Another shows Zac K. stands over the broken bodies of Bull and Nothing holding a decimated metal crutch. The camera spins back to the ring showing Popa Roach jumping around the ring before the camera roating around now showing Celtic Hyena with his back to the crowd standing at the top of the ramp way, as he puts his right hand in the air. It is followed by the clip of Maximus sets fire to Creepers body. Blackness engulfs everything as the music plays on. Each one of the HWC's wrestlers comes into view surrounded by shadows starting with Jericho and ending with Lucien. The mouth the whispering words, "I.... can't.... go..... on..... living.... thing.... way." But it is Popa Roach's voice heard and not the wrestlers. As the song comes to an end clips of A monk beating Creeper and Jericho with a baseball bat before revealing it to be Sephiroth. And ening with Blood Dragon powerbombing Panthro threw a chair between two plate glass windows.))
David: Welcome, everyone, to our final broadcast before the HWC Pay Per View, Christmas Chaos! We are LIVE from Lexington, Kentucky at the Rupp Arena! I'm David Tanjic, and with me as always is...
Travis: Travis Best! What a boring night this is going to be...
David: Harley's going to be here...
Travis: I changed my mind! It's always exciting when she's around!
David: *laughing* That's what I thought! Let's get to it, shall we?
Jobber Match
Agent Jobber vs. Tank the Dwarf
David: Folks, it's time for some action from our illustrious HWC Jobbers!
Travis: (groaning) Great, just what we need, an exhibition in ineptitude from a bunch of ingrates! At least I can catch up on my sleep. (folds his arms on the desk & lays his head down)
David: (shaking his head) Let's just get this one going!
(("Wake Up" by Rage Against The Machine hits over the speakers and Agent Jobber walks out slowly. He stands at the entryway and stares for a few moments before cracking his neck and knuckles. He then continues slowly to the ring. ))
Jean Fortello: The following match is scheduled for one fall. First, The Hardcore Wrestling Corporatrix, weighing 250 pounds, Agent Jobber!
David: The fans not exactly showing respect for Agent Jobber here!
Travis: Tell those idiots to be quiet! They're interrupting my beauty sleep!
David: Somehow, I doubt that they care!
(("Wake Up" fades. "Whiskey in the Jar" hits on the PA. White pyro goes off in small blasts the Tank walk out from the back carrying the sledge hammer over his shoulder. He then raises it above his head with both hands for a moment then brings it down on the floor before him. As he does so a large blast of red pyro explodes from behind him. Resting the hammer back over his shoulder he walks down to the ring. ))
Jean Fortello: His opponent, from the Mines of Moria, weighing 245 pounds, Tank the Dwarf!
David: A slightly mixed reaction for Tank the Dwarf, in light of his recent actions against HWC superstars!
Travis: (snoring)
David: Bold words of wisdom from Travis Best!
((The referee calls for the bell to start the match as the music fades. Tank & Agent circle, then meet in the center of the ring in the standard collar-and-elbow lock-up. They jockey for position for a moment, then with a roar Tank shoves Agent backwards into the corner. Agent hits and falls on his face. He gets slowly to his feet, and as tank approaches, suddenly launches a thrust kick, sending Tank staggering backwards. Agent presses his advantage by charging out of the corner and nailing a spinning wheel kick, which takes Tank down!))
David: Agent Jobber taking it to Tank here in the early going!
Travis: (snoring)
David: Great commentary there, Travis!
((Agent grabs one of Tank's thick legs, and attempts to go for the Jobber Lock, but Tank puts his free foot into Agent's backside, sending him headfirst back into the corner. Tank gets to his feet, and just as Agent turns, Tank lunges in with a hard Spear!))
David: Tank hit the Rampage!….a cover…1…2…3! Tank scores the victory!
Travis: (snoring)
Standard Match
Harley Quinn vs Klaus von Hammer
David: Well, next up, we have Harley going head to head with Klaus Von Hammer.
Travis: And we all know who’s going to win.
David: I’m not even going to ask.
Travis: Aw, come on! Ask!
David: No!
Travis: You’re no fun.
Jean Fortello: The following match is set for one fall. Introducing first, from Bremen, Germany, weighing in at 260 lbs. . . KLAUS VON HAMMER!!!
((Seek & Destroy plays on the PA, with white strobes flashing in the entrance way. As the main body of the song kicks in, there is a blast of pyro, and Klaus steps out, with his arms folded, looking around at the fans, then power walks to the ring. He rolls in underneath the bottom rope, climbs to the second turnbuckle, and flashes the "crossed hammers" at the fans, then does the same at the opposite corner. Klaus then waits, for his opponent.))
David: Klaus looking very good, here, tonight.
Travis: He’s got to. Because we all know who’s going to win.
David: Nice try, Travis. I’m not asking.
Travis: Damn you.
Jean Fortello: And his opponent, from the Black Light Section of the Jersey Shore, weighing in at 165 lbs, being accompanied to the ring by the Mafiaoso and her brother Scarpaci, she is the reigning HWC Women’s champion. . . HARLEY QUINN!!!
((The lights go down as a single spotlight goes over the crowd and then rests at the back of the stage, as "Took It Like A Woman" begins to play. The HWC-Tron comes to life with scenes from Harley's matches, with the Mafiaso, gaining the World Title, and sitting by herself in her office looking out the window over the water. Harley, and Johnny, Reno, Scarpaci, and Rude walk out, and make their way down to the ring. Harley's face is stern, as are the guys as they make their way to the ring. Once they reach the ring, Johnny helps her in, and helps her out of her suit jacket and kisses her before hopping out. Harley turns, getting floored by a massive clothesline that causes her to crumple up like an accordion at impact. Klaus pulls Harley to her feet, Harley quickly handspringing forward, then up, hitting a hurracanrana. Harley moves to stand outside, on the apron, jumping off with a missile dropkick as Klaus rises, Klaus sidestepping, catching Harley in midair, across his shoulders, face-up. Klaus quickly hits the Hammer Drop, hooking the leg. Behind him, however, Reno jumps onto the apron, distracting the referee as Scarpaci grabs an aluminum bat from under the ring, sliding into the ring, and cracking Klaus upside the back of his head, then sliding out of the ring.))
David: This match may be declared a draw!
Travis: Nope. Because we all know-
David: I’m not asking, Travis!
Travis: If I wasn’t contractually obligated to leave you alive, I’d kick you into that guardrail.
David: If you think you’re big enough, go for it!
((The lights flicker for a moment, then, as if it was entirely normal, The Creeper sits between the both of them, a headset on.))
Creeper: Keep it to yourselves, children.
David: Creeper?!
Creeper: Yes. Now call the match, you giant blowhard.
Travis(Snickering): He called you a blowhard.
Creeper: I wouldn’t be proud of that, Travis. You’re a vacuous mortal fool.
((David snickers as Reno drops from the apron, Harley moving to pin Klaus, appearing as out of it as Klaus is, right now. The referee slides into position, making the count. 1. . . 2. . . Klaus rolls the shoulder, as Harley groans. Harley, after a moment, kickflips to her feet, taking a moment to catch her balance, as Klaus slowly makes the move to his feet. Harley moves toward Klaus, only to get lifted, and carried, by a charging shoulder, Klaus slamming her, back-first, into the turnbuckle, then standing up, hitting two extremely short clotheslines, before rearing back, and hitting Harley with a clothesline that takes her over the top rope, Klaus going with her. Johnny begins arguing with the referee as the other three move around the ring, toward both Harley and Klaus, Scarpaci still brandishing the bat. Scarpaci nears Klaus, rearing to swing the bat, only to find the bat stuck, in midair, it seems.))
David: The Creeper has just, it appears, saved Klaus!
Travis: What?! Creeper, what are you doing?
Creeper: This match will be decided on who is the better athlete, not who has the better assistance. Sit, Scarpaci.
David: Uh. . . how did he do that?
((David is referring, of course, to the fact that The Creeper was not wearing the headset any longer. The Creeper, seemingly with no effort, pulls the bat from Scarpaci’s hands, then, as though it were a twig, breaking the bat in half. Behind him, Klaus and Harley both get to their feet. Fortunately, neither of them has the presence of mind to attack as they rise. Unfortunately, Rude and Reno do, hitting a double powerbomb into the top of the steel steps, before sliding Klaus into the ring. The Creeper turns at the sound of impact, moving toward Rude and Reno, who do have the presence of mind to back up. The Creeper raises an eyebrow, the lights flickering again. As the lights come back, Reno and Rude are ‘hogtied’ outside the ring. The Creeper returns to watching Scarpaci. Harley slowly gets to her feet, sliding into the ring, having missed the entire situation due to a slip, which had accidentally driven her headfirst into the apron. Harley slides into the ring, shaking her head, then looking around, shrugging, and hooking Klaus’ leg, the referee finally being allowed to turn around, the damage already done to Klaus. 1. . . 2. . . 3!!!))
David: Harley won, again!
Travis: Yeah. And she would have, even if the others hadn’t gotten involved.
David: I don’t know about that. Klaus seemed to have the match in hand until their interference.
Travis: Oh, sure, blame the Mafiaoso. It’s not their fault Klaus went and fell into their bat.
David: Right.
Main Event
Sephiroth du Lac vs Draven Masters
David: And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for our main event. We have a literal battle of the big men for you tonight...
Travis: Yawn-burger with a side of snore.
David: Travis, you are such an idiot... I don't see why Autumn doesn't replace you with someone with more vitality!
Travis: I'm the best there is. Plain and simple.
David: You're the best, all right... The best at being a PAIN IN THE ASS!
Jean Fortello: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first... From Chicago, Illinois... Weighing in at 290 lbs... Representing Bad News V2.0... Being accompanied by his sister Ravin... He is the DisasterPiece Champion... DRAVEN MASTERS!
(("Click Click Boom" blasts over the PA and Ravin Masters comes out onto the stage and walks to the ramp walking about halfway down and then throws up her hands. A huge blast of pyro goes off on the stage behind her and when it fades, Draven Masters is standing on the stage. He walks to Ravin and the two head to the ring. Draven and his sister reach the ring and she gives him a kiss on the cheek for good luck.))
Jean Fortello: And his opponent... From Du Lac Manor, New York... Weighing in at 246 lbs... Representing the "Old" Darkside... He is the Fallen One... SEPHIROTH DU LAC!
((The lights go out as a beautiful choir sings in Latin. The screen shows Seph's symbol (A cross inside an eternal Pentagram) as the voices begin to fade. Finally lightning effects strike the stage area and blue pyro flames shoot up and the lights flicker on. "Whisper" by Evanescence begins to play as Seph and the Sabbat Pack walk to the ring. Seph hops up on the top turnbuckle and roars at the crowd, who roars right back at him. He hops down and gets hit with a thunderous clothesline. The bell rings to signal the start of the match and Jean escapes from the ring without being squashed.))
David: Draven Masters is fired up tonight, Travis!
Travis: Go away. I don't want to talk to you.
David: Hey, I call em like I see em. Besides, Ravin's at ringside...
Travis: Who cares? I want Chloe.
David: So does Sephiroth. And he gets the chance to take out his frustration on Draven.
Travis: Good. I hope he kills him.
((David sighs and waffles Travis with his clipboard as Draven throws Seph into the turnbuckle and follows up with an avalanche. Seph comes out of the corner and nails Draven with a clothesline of his own, sending the DisasterPiece Champion reeling back against the ropes. Draven comes off the ropes with an elbow that knocks Seph down to one knee.))
David: This doesn't look good for Seph... He's giving up 44 pounds in weight to Draven!
Travis: You can't count him out yet... He's the Fallen One, you know.
David: Oh, so now you're talking to me. You didn't happen to find a bookie Commissioner Novak doesn't know about, did you?
Travis: Don't be silly. Of course not. I know when to behave.
David: That's good to know. But Seph has to be feeling frustrated because he lost to Jarred Dylan not too long ago. And Jarred's roughly the same weight as Seph!
Travis: That was last week on Slaughter, David, and you're right. Seph is a skilled athlete and losing to a member of the group he started has to be a kick in the teeth. No pun intended.
((Seph seems to hear Travis and roars before slamming into Draven with a vicious clothesline that sends the big man spinning around, then slamming down into the mat. Draven gets right up and grabs Seph in an armbar. Seph swings around and turns the armbar into a hammerlock. Then he shoves Draven forward and hits a dropkick into his back. Draven hits the mat hard.))
David: Whoa!
Travis: Told ya so.
David: I think Draven's not focusing because the Enforcer's gone. The founder of Bad News has left the HWC to go into the family business, whatever that may be.
Travis: I hate to say this, but you're probably right. I'm gonna miss that big lug... It's going to be awfully quiet around here without him!
David: Amen to that, Travis... Amen to that.
((Back in the ring, Draven pulls himself to his feet and turns to see Seph's back as he leans over to talk to Brimstone and Trent. He grins and charges like a raging bull, slamming into Seph's back and sending him over the top rope to the floor. Ravin cheers her brother and gives him a high five.))
Travis: Mmm, Ravin sure is a beauty!
David: Now that's the Travis I remember!
Travis: I wonder if she'd go out with me.
David: She might... But then, she might threaten to cut them off.
Travis: *yelping and covering himself with his hands* That's okay... I think I'll admire her from afar!
((David laughs as Seph picks himself up off the floor and rolls into the ring. Draven catches him with a boot to the face that sends him reeling. But Seph gets right back up and nails Draven with a boot to the midsection, then grabs him around the neck.))
David: This doesn't look good for Draven... That's the prelude to the...
((FALLEN ANGEL DDT! Seph goes for the cover. 1... 2... Draven just barely gets the shoulder up! But Seph just laughs darkly and muscles Draven into position for a dropkick. Ravin goes to grab Seph's leg, but Trent taps her on the shoulder and shakes his finger, saying "Ah, ah, ah!". Then he grabs her arms and forces her to watch. Seph laughs again as Draven hits the mat. Then he roars at the crowd. They roar back with gusto. He gets Draven to his feet and...))
Travis: SHADOWSPHERE!
((He goes for a cover. 1... 2... 3! The bell rings and Seph's arm gets raised in victory. Ravin fights loose and slides into the ring to check on her brother. Seph gets a chair from Brimstone and raises it up above his head. The lights go out right at that moment. When they come back up, there's no sign of the Masters siblings and Seph is laid out with the chair he went to use on Draven. On Seph's chest is a single, perfect, black rose.))
David: What happened?
Travis: I'll tell you what happened... The Creeper happened! The black rose is the symbol Seph used to recruit the Darkside! He's using it to mock Seph!
David: I don't think so, Travis... That isn't The Creeper's style. He's more of an in your face kind of guy.
Travis: But if that wasn't The Creeper, then who the hell was it?
((An eerie voice comes across the PA...))
Voice: All will be revealed at Slaughter.
David: Okay, I am officially spooked!
Travis: Me too!
David: And on that note... For Travis Best and the rest of the HWC, I'm David Tanjic. We'll see you after the Pay Per View. Goodnight, everybody!
((The scene fades as the transmission dies. Copyright Hardcore Wrestling Corporation, 2003))